How the Brain Prioritizes Information
Inspired by “Dr. Tara Swart- Manifestation, Laws of Attraction, and Clarity of Intention”.
Dr. Tara Swart, a neuroscientist, has focused on how the brain processes and prioritizes information. She is an expert on how we can retrain our brains to attract what we want. It's called manifestation. Dr. Swart’s speaks from a scientific perspective about what manifestation actually is, and how we already have the tools to leverage the law of attraction to our advantage. You may be asking, “What does this have to do with what Tessa James does as a Divorce Coach?” or “How is this relevant to an individual going through a divorce?”
Well, I’ll tell you.
"Manifestation"
What if I told you the term “manifestation”, real manifestation, is both simple and very profound. “Manifestation is bringing into reality the outcomes you desire,” says Dr. Swart. “Manifestation happens when you combine Strong Intentions, Feelings PLUS Beliefs with Sufficient Action to make a Desired Outcome Real.” If this were spelled out as a math problem, it would look something like this:
SI (F plus B) plus SA equals DO
So, think about this for a moment or five – what are your strong intentions, feelings and beliefs about moving through your divorce with specific actions all to end up with the desired outcome you have in your heart and your brain? What does that look like? Truly believing you can get where you need to be, you believe it and will act on it very directly and intently. For example, I believe I will stay in and own the current home (or reside in a new location of my strong liking) I share with my soon-to-be ex, and this is how I will manifest this desire….
Dr. Swart argues the law of attraction is scientifically sound and totally accessible: “The law of attraction is strongly connected to us aligning all of our brain power. It describes the way that we can create the relationships, situations, and material things that come into our lives as a direct consequence of the way we think and the subconscious beliefs that underlie that. We ‘manifest’ them by focusing on them, visualizing them becoming true, and directing our energy towards them through our actions.” Translation? It’s about clarity of intention, and mindfully working towards your intentions, rather than simply waiting for the universe to perform a random act of kindness.
This reframing of manifestation is realistic, and it feels empowering. She adds, “Manifesting is merely another way of saying we will make something happen’. It relates to the action rather than to mere intention. It is a directed and purposeful connection between our intention and the actions that we take.” During though the pre-present and even post-divorce phases are stressful, my clients tend to feel all over the place; this is a way to zone in and understand what is important to you, what is worth fighting for. And it’s a way to really zero in on the desired outcome. The feeling can turn into a more empowering and organized role in the divorce process and future healing.
Finding Clarity in Your Intentions
This does take some effort, folks. What makes it so hard to bridge the gap between desire and outcome? Dr. Swart says that one reason we struggle with intention and clarity is “information overload”. One of the topics she discusses in her book, The Source, is that the two physiological processes, ‘selective attention’ and ‘value tagging’, happen in the brain simultaneously. Understanding and accepting that we are all blocking huge amounts of information and choosing to focus on other information"—aka, selective attention—"is crucial to the power of manifestation because you can’t manifest what you don’t consciously notice. Thus, we need to actively direct our brain to move away from prioritizing these unconscious biases and be more open, flexible and courageous about pushing ourselves towards our goals and choices.” First Action Item: she suggests writing down the qualities that you want in a partner, for example, and revisiting the list frequently. That way, instead of gravitating towards romantic matches who fall into old—and unfulfilling—relationship models, you may be more likely to naturally filter out matches that don’t fit your needs and make time for those that do. This is the same for my clients; we focus on the future, post-divorce, and truly what lifestyle we see for ourselves.
Value Tagging and Logic
Value tagging, on the other hand, “is the importance your brain assigns to every piece of information and [how your brain orders information] based on importance,” says Dr. Swart. “There are logical and emotional elements of tagging.” In short, according to Swart's theory, the choices we make can rely on logic or emotion. As such, she suggests true manifestation requires a mix of logic and intuition, and the ability to recognize when our choices are motivated by feelings or beliefs that actually work against our values. Dr. Swart notes, “People tend to struggle with emotional tagging because this has to do with our levels of social safety.’"
For example, if someone has just been through a divorce and was not able to have children with that spouse or has been single for a long time and their biological clock has been ticking, then their value tagging system may paradoxically become biased against looking for a companion to have children with. The thought may be too damaged, or they’ve lived alone for too long to share their space with anyone new, or their career and social life supersedes a new relationship and thus won’t be alert to the opportunity of a likely candidate for a new relationship. “Simply put, when you allow your brain to be conscious of and focus on what you want in life, the raised awareness that results will work in your favor to automatically bring opportunities into your life.”
Mindfulness alongside Neuroplasticity
Retraining your neural pathways, Dr. Swart pointed out that we don’t need to spend extensive amounts of time on neuroplasticity. Dr. Swart indicates, research has shown, through brain scans, that people who use mindfulness meditation experience significant neuroplastic changes in the brain.
Dr. Swart says, “Commit to devoting a few minutes a day to meditate. Giving you clarity on what your real priorities in the divorce process and in life, improving your resilience, making you more considered and balanced in your approach.”
What now?
Now you may be asking, “How do I achieve this?” Well, it is challenging to do it alone. To explore using these principles in your divorce, book a complimentary discovery session with me today.
